Hyperbole And A Half

December 7, 2010 at 1:55 am | Posted in Guild Wars 2, mmorpg | 7 Comments
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My god they've got me hyping for them right now! Without even knowing it!

It is a pretty common tragedy in life to be excited and thrilled by an upcoming game. It’s shiny and new, glorious and seductive. It has many new features which by all accounts will most likely roxor my boxors. Who can resist the tawdry allure of game hype?

Then, there is the downfall. The immense backlash that follows big hype.

Surprisingly the video game in question fails to stimulate the dopamine glands in the pleasure centers of the brain. This results in the opposite effect. With little to no dopamine, big frowny faces begin appearing in typed dialogue on things called “forums”.

Right now there is very little hype for Guild Wars 2. Therefore I suppose it is somewhat pointless to write about the differences between hype and reality. The massive gulf between what people believe and imagine and what they will experience. Bad timing on my part as usual.


    Take a moment to reassert calmness in your life. If you feel the massive weight of game hype crushing your very soul, just breathe. Fill your lungs to capacity and then slowly exhale. Like rain water running into a pool of jade, and then evaporating in the Canthan sun. Like imbibing a potion of energy and then, no wait, I mentioned potions, rage incoming! Moving on!

    Expect The Worst

    One way you might avoid getting fooled by hype is to not believe any of it. Dynamic Events? They’re not going to be all that dynamic, plus I bet they’re instanced. Good graphics? Minecraft has better graphics! Jumping? There won’t be any jumping, everybody knows there’s no jumping in Guild Wars.

    You Are Being Brainwashed

    It is the job of marketing and community to preach the virtues of the game they are working on only in positive terms. Most companies would prevent you from even using negative words in context. You have to be conscious of this. Fallout 3 isn’t all grey all the time, it’s a concrete post-apocalyptic wasteland. New Vegas doesn’t have bugs, it has a hardcore difficulty setting. Guild Wars 2 isn’t behind schedule, because they never had a schedule!

    Stop Guessing

    Don’t extrapolate large amounts of information from small pieces of evidence. Stop trying to figure out the number of zones, don’t try to figure out the mysterious 8th class, refrain from studying every released detail, and prevent yourself from plunging into the depths of heavy speculation. Sigh. *Quits blog* *Ends self*

    It Is A Game

    Believe it or not, Guild Wars 2 will not cure cancer. I know, I’m surprised too, but there you have it. I was sure it was going to save millions of lives on release, so now I have to admit, I’m feeling disappointed. What’s wrong with you Arenanet? Don’t you want to cure cancer?

    Expect To Get Bored

    If you play a game 20, 30, or even 40 hours a week, expect to get bored. If you’re off in the world of Tyria for as much time as any full time job, I’m not sure why you’re complaining that there isn’t more content. The game has kept you as busy as a full time job. I suppose I should put this another way for students and children. Quit whining, at least you don’t have a full time job.

    Play Other Games

    One of the best ways to avoid massive disappointment is to keep things realistic. If you’ve been waiting for Guild Wars 2 to be released, and haven’t been playing other games in the meantime, you’re missing out. There are mountains to ascend, civilizations to conquer, dirt to punch, go out there and try it. Other games will keep your feet rooted in the reality that many games exist, and Guild Wars 2 is one of them. No good will come from you sitting on your thumbs, ranting about a game that isn’t out for another 8 months on your inane boring blog.

Reality rarely catches up to the scenarios we imagine in our heads. There is no limit to what we can think of, and every limit to what is possible. Unless of course you believe in double rainbows. I hear they go all the way across the sky.



  1. I do all the above.

    Minecraft is the first online game I’ve tried since finding Guild Wars back in 2005.

    Sad, sad, sad.

    • well at least you’re doing that much. lots of people live and breathe only the game they’re waiting for. its a mistake.

  2. Aw, I thought you were referring to this gem of a blog:


    • I love that blog. the author doesn’t post nearly as much as I’d like but she’s damn good about quality. I had been reading it earlier and the title is a hat tip.

      • Nice. 🙂

        This is a good article, by the way. Hype does funny things to people, and when a game like an MMO requires critical mass in the early adoption phase, it can kill a game.

        • yeah backlash sucks, its almost universally undeserved.

  3. […] [Hunters Insight] Hyperbole And A Half […]

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